little boy tay tay...

...go blow your horn. yes, we have taken to calling him "tay tay". i am not sure it is a nick name i want to stick, but for now, as a toddler, it is pretty darn cute and so is he. with each day he uncovers just a little more of his personality for us to see. we are tickled by his silly and babbling nature, in awe of his ability to climb- really high and precarious situations, and only just a little concerned about his true little boy instinct.

how sweet is your love

mateo is fighting a little bug. the last two nights have been rough going for that little peanut. both nights i have had to bring him in to bed with us to snuggle a bit-- not that it really is that much of a sacrifice! and last night i brought him in, laid with him for a bit and then went off to brush my teeth and whatnot and i came back to find little mateo with his arm wrapped around his big sister's neck. talk about making your heart melt. their relationship seems to get stronger each day. mateo adores pilar and pilar teases him with loving affection to no end. i have a feeling that mateo might someday say what tio has said in the past-- that he feels like he has two mother's at times. but i think i have gotten better at not mothering my brother over the years and i am sure pilar will learn to do the same. especially if she has her own children to mother some day. but it is true that there is nothing quite like the love of a sibling-- it is irresistibly sweet.

"zappa zappa zappa..."

this is mateo's favorite word right now and he says it with such enthusiasm about most everything. i wish i knew exactly what it meant but regardless, it is adorable and we have all taken to saying it which delights him even more! ah the 18 month old, such a spark of willingness and curiosity. such a force of energy!

wrap your arms around me...

it has been a hard week. hell, it has been a hard year. but the sun is shining here in portland, the trees are plump with green leaves, we have baby blue jays living in our backyard, the garden is sprouting and the kids continue to blossom every day- reminding me of what is truly important in this world. and it's the moments like these that i want to wrap my arms around and never let go...


in other newsly news;
*we had two special visits with dear s.f. friends this weekend--miss laurel & miss peggi
*the chicken coop is almost done and the girls are itching to get out.
*mateo is an insesant babble machine-- sometimes i know what he is saying and other times i guess...
*pilar has only 2 weeks left of being a 1st grader!?!?! crazy!
*i am on my own the next couple of days and am a wee bit nervous...does this feeling ever go away?
*david is taking on a business partner and shifting business direction! this is a good thing! (more later).
*i managed to NOT cook dinner for the past 2 nights-- not cooking dinner is like a mini vacation.

why we love waldorf

PVS-Charter Renewal Version from Hellinabucket on Vimeo.

this video was created to support our school's charter renewal that was up this year. our school's charter was unanimously approved for another 3 years! we are incredibly grateful and it is very clear that many others are as well.

this tender work

mothering is tender work. it brings up so much grief and self reflection that sometimes it feels too much to bear. that is what i am realizing in all of this- this past year and a half has really rattled me, shaken me in to awakening to who i really am and who i really want to be in this world. along with this comes the realization of who i have been and not always liking that person. grief. i know all of what i have been feeling this past 1.5 years has purpose and is slowing guiding me to my own truth but that does not mean it has been without much pain. but slowly, i think i am learning that all we really have in this life is this moment- that's it, the future is uncertain and the past is over. and being in this moment is sometimes the hardest place to be.

newest members of the family

we are joining the portland urban homesteading ranks and have just added 5 new members to our family. please meet nelly, boots, mabel, sunshine, and fern. if luck is on our side we will find ourselves with 5 good hens. at this point we know for sure that 3 will be hens but the gender of the 2 bantams is yet to be known. by late summer we should be enjoying some delicious home grown eggs for breakfast.
pilar is a proud proud mother tending carefully to her new chicks. mateo, well, we keep him at a far distance just because we are pretty sure he does not know his own strength! david is hoping that the next 5 weeks will prove to be enough time to get a coop built. and i am trying to be totally on board, though feeling quite cautious of the additional load. it is a good thing they are so darn cute! we look forward to introducing you to them when you come to visit.