my computer that is.
thursday night was one of those nights where you can't believe you are a parent. first, your nearly 7 year old comes to you at 1 in the morning complaining of her stomach hurting and can she please get in bed with you. in your slumber stupor you say "come on in". one hour later she sits straight up in bed (mind you she is in the middle of you and your partner) and says "i don't feel so good" followed by a large upheaval of that night's dinner. you and your partner somehow manage to wake enough to get her in to the bathroom to finish the job and disrobe your bed of any offended covers and climb back in to bed in hopes of more rest.
second your barely 1 year old wakes up inconsolably at 3 am. this leaves your partner beyond irritated. you kindly urge your partner to go sleep up stairs and you will handle it (thinking the worst is over).
third, at 4am your very sick, nearly 7 year old wakes again and complains that she doesn't feel so good and proceeds to upchuck on the remaining covers on the bed. once again you remove all of the offended covers this time only salvaging the mattress cover and one blanket. not nearly enough coverage on a below freezing night.
anyway, at this point you manage to clean up the nearly 7 year old, wash your own hands and climb back in to the very inadequate bed in hopes of a few more winks.
so, you get your winks. your very kind partner gets up at 8:30 with the barely 1 year old and feeds him breakfast and kindly lets you and the very sick nearly 7 year old sleep until 10 am!!!! that is a beautiful gift and you realize you have not properly thanked him for this and you should.
fast forward to 10:30 am. your nearly 7 year old is in the very inadequately made bed with no appetite and looking pretty green. you offer her a video in bed on the laptop. she musters a small smile and says "okay". you get her set up with a very cheesy holiday movie as well as a very big jug of ice water with a bendy straw and ask "are you sure you won't eat a piece of toast with as much butter as it can hold?" "no" she sadly replies. you know it must be very bad if she is turning down that much butter. anyway, shortly after the cheeseball movie begins your barely 1 year old, who is more like a bulldozer rather than a baby, makes his way in the bedroom and finds the big jug of water. he proceeds to dump the jug of water on the bed where it conveniently seeps in the back vents of your computer. "shit! f**k! arrrrrghhhh i am really mad" you scream as you snatch up your beloved friend and break down in tears at its' black face. "why are you so mad mama", your nearly 7 year old asks you "is that your best friend?" yikes, you realize you must really be addicted to your computer if your nearly 7 year old calls it your best friend.
but the truth is, you really don't care about the computer. i mean, if you could take it back you would but what really gets you is how much of an idiot you are and have not backed up a year and a half of family pictures. the ones you intended to use for your annual photo book of the kids. but now they might be gone forever. enter the apple store hero. after she takes a little look she says "well, we can probably save your hard drive but you're probably looking at a 999 mistake". meaning, you're going to have to buy a new computer. you hang your head in disappointment but are truly grateful to have not lost your hard drive. because if you had, you might also have lost your marbles.
